If There's a Next Life, I'll Let Go

Matilda Sutton, my wife, and I are on our tenth wedding anniversary trip when the plane suddenly crashes. I hand her the last remaining parachute, only for her to scoff and ask, "What are you up to this time, Tyler?" I feel a sudden ache in my chest, knowing that Matilda has never loved me in our ten years of marriage. She has also seen me play the hero enough times that it doesn't even register anymore. But this time, it's a genuine matter of life and death. I push her out of the door right as flames engulf the cabin. "If there's a next life, I'll leave you alone, Matilda." Consciousness returns. I find that I've returned to the exact moment I'm about to propose to Matilda. I try to stay as far away from her as possible, but she keeps approaching me with a bright smile. "I didn't get to tell you this in our past life—if there is a next life, I'm never letting you go, Tyler." Chapter 1 In that instant, a wave of cheers broke out as people began moving around me, the noise gradually growing louder. I snapped back to my senses after hearing their voices. As I looked around, I was stunned all over again. I had actually returned to the exact day I proposed to Matilda Sutton ten years ago! Matilda wasn't well-known at the time, being nothing more than an obscure singer. I had proposed to her at this event, which was just a small, private gig she invited only her close friends to. I was caught off guard as I looked at her young and beautiful face on stage, unable to pull myself together for a moment. It was then that a friend of mine, whose name I couldn't even remember, nudged me and shoved a huge bouquet into my hands. "What are you waiting for, Tyler? You're up next! Go on!" In the meantime, the atmosphere around the stage had reached its peak, with fireworks erupting across the sky at just the right moment. In the middle of that picture-perfect scene, I walked over and dumped the bouquet into a nearby trash can. "What are you doing, Tyler?" My other friends were stunned. I had asked all of them to come and help me with the proposal, and they knew how long I had spent planning it. But I was fully aware that there was no reason to go through with the proposal in this life. It wasn't long before the fireworks ended, like the curtain coming down on a show, and I missed my chance. Matilda and I were meant to end here anyway. In my past life, I had spent years forcing a relationship that was never going to work, and in the end, I hadn't even gotten one sincere "I love you" from her. I had accepted the bouquet from my friend back then and nervously walked up to propose to her. Matilda had just ended her performance, and the look of contempt she gave me was one that I would never forget. "You think I'd marry you just because you bought all this, Tyler? You've got to be kidding me! "You'd better not think you can insult me with your money just because you're a spoiled scion! Do you really think everyone just cares about your money, Tyler?" I was so humiliated right then that I was completely at a loss, and all my excitement just died out. I later became the laughingstock across the entire social scene when someone uploaded the video of the incident online. "Aren't you going to propose to Matilda, Tyler?" I saw the confusion on my friends' faces and exclaimed, "I'm not proposing anymore! Come on, let's go grab some drinks! You guys have worked hard!" I turned around and walked away with my friends, not even looking at Matilda on stage. I had barely taken a few steps when the crowd around us started to stir—Matilda had come down from the stage. I scowled slightly, finding that things weren't playing out the way I remembered. I didn't even have the time to react, as Matilda suddenly gathered her dress, walked toward me, and blocked my path. "Where are you off to, Tyler? D-Do you have nothing to say to me?" I turned slightly to look at Matilda, whose youthful face was still flushed and pretty from all that running. I remained quiet as she stood there staring at me with intent, clearly waiting for something. I instinctively backed up a little and kept my distance. "I have nothing to say to you. I have things to take care of, so I'll head off now." I tried to walk around her and leave, but one of my friends grabbed me and shot me a look, as if telling me that I should propose to Matilda after making all those preparations. I still had the ring tucked in my pocket, after all. I had truly decided not to propose to her anymore, so after a beat of pure silence, I made my move to go. Matilda suddenly reached her hand out to me, biting her lip with a look of hesitation on her face. "Where is the thing, Tyler?" Chapter 2 "What are you talking about?" I couldn't really figure out what was happening, completely thrown off by Matilda's initiative. I couldn't help but wonder when her personality changed and whether this was supposed to be the same timeline I remembered. Derek Lister, one of my friends, thought I had chickened out because I was nervous. He sensed the shift in atmosphere, jogged over to fetch the bouquet, and shoved it back into my hands. "Are you seriously going to chicken out, Tyler? If you're a man, spit it out—say what you were planning to say all along!" In that instant, the rest of my friends joined in on the cheering, looking on with keen interest as the situation developed. It was noisy all around, but I just stood there holding the bouquet, showing no emotion on my face. Matilda didn't mind it either. She remained silent for a moment before she reached out to take the bouquet from my hand. She examined the bouquet thoroughly, her tone carrying a blend of happiness and fond recollection. "You actually got me forget-me-nots? They aren't even in season right now. I love them very much. Thanks for buying me these, Tyler." That reminded me that I had specially ordered and designed this bouquet because Matilda liked forget-me-nots. It didn't matter to me anymore, though. "Is that so? You can keep them, then. I'll be leaving now." I couldn't stand her gaze. It unsettled me so much that I blurted those words, turned on my heel, and left. In all of the past ten years, Matilda had never given me a look like that—it was always revulsion or indifference. I couldn't wrap my head around what she was thinking, and I didn't care to guess either, clueless as to how skipping the proposal triggered a butterfly effect. I just wanted to get out of there at that moment. Derek chased after me in frustration and grabbed my arm. "What's wrong with you, Tyler Jensen? Matilda obviously showed interest in you just now! How could you just walk away now? We've spent so long helping you put this together!" I felt a sharp pang in my chest as I heard what he said. I had no idea why Matilda was suddenly acting so differently toward me, even talking to me so gently, but there was no way she had any feelings for me. In my past life, we had been married for a long time without having any children. Matilda was constantly on the road for shows back then, and after we got married, she used the Jensen family's influence to advance her career. She had already become one of the country's top female singers by the time we died in the plane crash. She had only ever used my family and me to further her career. She was incredibly cold toward me in private. She didn't like having any physical contact with me, so we even slept in separate rooms. She never once told me she loved me, even when the plane went down, and I gave her my only chance to survive. I still remembered the look on her face when I shoved the last parachute into her hands. There was shock and gratitude, but no love or reluctance to part whatsoever. I bet the last thing I told her—that I was setting her free—sounded like music to her ears. "You should just give it a rest, Derek. Matilda and I will never have a future together. I'm sorry for troubling you guys to come out, but let's just say I finally came to my senses. I'll buy you all drinks next time!" I yanked my hand free from Derek's grip after saying that. Derek was clearly baffled, but he could only yield to my decision. I rubbed my face and tried to clear my head once I parted with my friends. I caught my reflection in a storefront window as I walked past and froze for a moment. I realized then that I was still in my 20s in this life. I had been given a second chance in life, so I was determined to find someone who actually loved me and to make up for the regrets of my past. I drove home looking completely renewed, leading Mom and Dad to assume I had successfully won over Matilda. They immediately grew excited. Dad even flashed me a knowing wink and asked, "How did it go, Tyler? Did you set off the fireworks? Did my advice work out for you?" Chapter 3 Mom smacked Dad's arm with an annoyed huff. "You've been using that same old fireworks display for a few decades now! Do you really think young people nowadays enjoy these sorts of things?" I was overjoyed when I saw Mom and Dad looking so young. I pulled them both into a hug and exclaimed, "I'm back, Mom and Dad! I missed you guys so much!" My parents were both taken aback by how I was acting, but then they broke into smiles. Mom patted me on the back, looking just as thrilled. "What's gotten into you? How come you're acting so clingy after proposing to someone? Did it work out, Tyler?" I felt strangely put on the spot, given that I hadn't proposed to Matilda at all. I was just genuinely happy to see them. "You've got it all wrong. I'm not—" I was just about to set things straight when Dad suddenly cut me off. "You don't have to explain anything to us, Tyler. I completely get it!" They both acted like they knew exactly what was going on and acted all secretive about it, which left me amused and helpless. Mom held onto Dad's arm and flashed me a warm smile. "Oh, by the way, Tyler! Your birthday is tomorrow, so your father and I have put together a surprise for you!" I froze for a moment. I didn't remember this happening at all in my past life. I had spent two straight days drinking with my friends after Matilda rejected my proposal, and when I finally sobered up, Dad had to come and drag me home. I realized that because I chose differently in this lifetime, my future path had shifted as well. But I didn't feel any panic about not knowing what was coming next. I was just grateful for a second chance. I was determined to cherish this new life and make every single opportunity count. Mom and Dad had always doted on me, so they went all out for my birthday party. They had even brought in event planners to deck out the villa for that very day. I couldn't help but wonder if they had decorated the villa like this in my past life too, only to spend two days waiting for me to show up. Dad had probably heard from someone that I had been rejected and made a fool of myself, then had to track his drunk son down and drag me home. I felt slightly guilty just thinking about that. I thought the birthday party would just be a fun, lively gathering, but on the second day, someone unexpected showed up. Matilda appeared in the garden in a white dress, standing alongside Mom and Dad as they introduced her to our relatives. She would occasionally look at me with a gentle smile. I stood there frozen as they walked up, letting out a barely noticeable frown. Mom patted Matilda's hand affectionately while Dad added, "Do you see how beautiful and thoughtful Matilda is, Tyler? She knew it was your birthday, so she came all the way here just to sing for you." I pinched the bridge of my nose and, under Mom and Dad's pointed looks, said stiffly, "Thanks." Matilda's eyes lit up as she smiled at me. "You're welcome! I'll sing one of your favorite songs later!" I remained silent while she took her place on the small stage in the garden. She sang my favorite song as the band accompanied her. I stood in the crowd feeling completely miserable and out of place. I couldn't embarrass Mom and Dad during this time, so I was forced to squeeze out a smile to acknowledge Matilda's birthday wishes delivered before everyone. In my past life, we were married for ten years, yet she had rarely ever wished me a happy birthday. I pulled Matilda aside once that agonizing ordeal was finally over and asked her sternly, "What are you playing at, Matilda? We're nowhere near close enough for you to show up at my birthday party!" Matilda froze, her eyes instantly welling up with tears. "I just wanted to celebrate your birthday with you…" She broke down the next moment and began crying uncontrollably. I was baffled by her reaction, but seeing her cry still caused an involuntary pang in my chest. After all, ten years of feelings couldn't possibly be erased overnight. Still, I couldn't figure out why she was crying. In my past life, I had seen her cry only a handful of times in ten years. "What are you—"